Over the last couple days, the writing bug has finally hit me. Sure, I blog on here and that is considered writing, but what I’m talking about is writing for other purposes…both fiction and non-fiction purposes. Woohoo! The fiction one, I’m not going to be going into detail on, but I can spare some details on the non-fiction one. It’s basically a lot of my experiences relayed here, but structured in a more organized format…and more personal details.
Interestingly enough, when I tried to reflect back on how I got to where I am right now in my treatment, I found that much of it was documented through text messages. The reason why, is because when it comes to communicating with my family, that’s my primary form of communication. Now that I have a lot more time on my hands, I’m a little better about making phone calls, but still, it’s mostly text messages.
So I thought I’d share some with you. Some are interesting. Some are frustrating, knowing what I know now. But some are funny, too.
Side note: Names have been blocked to protect the innocent (except for my husband because you know his name is Jake and you know we share a last name). Dad cell and mom cell = My parents (obviously), but my mom’s messages include her phone number, so I removed that. K Cell or M Cell = My sisters. My brother and soon to be sister-in-law aren’t shown in this series, but they were also clued in to all of the happenings.
When I went into the hospital the first time and they were trying to rule out Tuberculosis…
My general feeling at that first hospital stay that they were “Missing the forest for the trees.” Note to self: Trust your gut!
While in the hospital the first time, I was awakened at 5am to talk to a general hospitalist that would be looking over my case. I asked him when I would get to speak to the hematologist…because I was supposed to speak with him the day before, and he was so rude to me! Here’s the convo I had with my sisters after I talked to him.
This is a recap of my first conversation with the hematologist at the first hospital. One of the first of many times doctors told me that this was likely NOT cancer.
In the hospital, I had to consider what was really important in my life. At this moment, it was all about the McDonald’s breakfast menu.
After my first bronchoscopy, the initial diagnosis was that the thing in my lungs did not look like cancer. And then the diagnosis a day later showed that no cancer cells were found. Reassuring, right?
A couple weeks after the first bronchoscopy, I took the hematologist up on his word to do a cat scan of my neck in order to see if there was anything else going on in my body that could be cancerous. At this point, I’d gotten the full results back from my bronchoscopy – which was that that they still couldn’t figure out what was going on with me…but that they did not see any cancer cells. Again, more validation that this is likely NOT cancer. Are you getting frustrated yet? Yeah, I feel ya.
Now we’re going to fast forward past the second hospital visit, past the cancer diagnosis and jump into a more light hearted conversation with my family. Because at this point, almost all that can be said, has been said.
And finally, more fast forwarding to my second chemo treatment when I found out I will continue to be neutropenic for the remainder of my chemo treatments.
This is certainly not the full story. But I’m really glad that I have this transcript of experiences that I can pull from to see how I was feeling or what I was thinking at any one time.
Also, to my family if you’re reading this — keep on going with the uncensored texts you send to me. I need good material for my book!!!